Glasgow Uni 5 Mile Race

By Ewan Smith

The Glasgow Uni 5 mile is a race I’ve looked at a few times but never actually entered, partly because usually there are better, warmer, sunnier places to go in October. I hadn’t actually got the length of entering the week before and when I dingyed the club 5K on the Tuesday, I put the idea out my mind. But on the Friday, I decided to give it a go. After all, sitting on your erse for a week is better preparation than a fancy training plan; is it not?

The race takes place at Glasgow Uni’s facility out in Garscube a more plush facility than was available back in the day ( though tbh I was such a committed athlete then that a fag usually took the place of a cool doon). A quick look at the rest of the guys in the queue for numbers filled me with trepidation. Every last one was barely 20 and I felt like one of those guys who, having spent just too long in the pub, ends up in a night club instead of going home to the bosom of the family. Fortunately, some other auld flas turned up behind me. Less fortunately,, I tweeged a number of familiar faces amongst them so the queue was the only place where they would be behind me.

The start was uphill with boards laid across a cattle grid at the main gate. However, nobody had opened the main gate and a bottleneck ensued as everyone tried to pick their way through billiards and out a side gate. I clattered my hip on a bollard which if nothing else should be good as an excuse for at least a month.

The course was described as “undulating“, The Big Fla once took issue with me for telling him that the Kyles 10 miles would be “undulating.” It’s the same sort of undulating And so we undulated for 4K. It was also quite twisty so you could never quite see where each undulate would end.

It’s a 2 lap course so having peched roon it once you know that you have pech roon it again. In my case peching more quickly but running more slowly. But at least you have some idea where the top of the undulations are. Finally in a less than record breaking I 32:35 I crossed the finish line, resolving to either retire or try a bit harder - as if either are likely outcomes.

If you’re into medals, goody bags and T-shirt’s then this race isn’t for you; they dont even extend the length of a bottle of water. But if you just want to push yourself in a race with decent runners then at £7 this is a great race. And if I’m not retired or lying in the sun next October I might even try a bit harder next year.